I like to eat. This is no secret. But I am not one of those people who go out of their way to try the weirdest, craziest food they can find. I like to eat because I enjoy eating, and if something is weird I will totally eat it, but only if it sounds like I will enjoy it. For that reason, I don’t eat a lot of crazy-ass food. Also, I am in Spain, not in some small town in China or India or Peru, so the cuisine is preeettty similar to what I would encounter in America, except everything leans a little towards HAM. But still, they eat some nasty shit. And sometimes I love it.

Anyways, turns out I have eaten some weird stuff here. I decided to make a list. So here it is, from least weird to most weird, along with the location of where I indulged in these fine delicacies. Enjoy!:

7. Pork knee: Yep, just a pig’s knee. Turns out they are pretty big. Also turns out they taste just like RIBS!!! This was a specialty in Prague and I think it weighed something like 2.2 kilos, which is a hell of a lot of meat, regardless of whether or not there is a giant bony knee in there. Highly recommended, especially if accompanied by a humongous beer on a cold rainy day in the Czech Republic!

6. Frog’s legs: Taste like fishy chicken, look like small human legs. I also DO NOT like that the two legs (and hips and nether regions) of the frog are served still all together in one piece, like the body was just severed at the little froggy-waist, cooked (kinda), and thrown on your plate. Blah! Pontepez, Madrid. (Still love Pontepez though!)

5. Wild Boar: Served in a “huevos rotos” dish, which means eggs scrambled with slices of potato and other things, in this case “other things” would be Pumba from the Lion King. Okokok I know he was a warthog, but my friend described it to me as “Timon from El Rey Leon” because he didn’t know the word “boar,” so I had to throw that in there. Not that weird, but that is why it’s not number 1. Asturian restaurant, Madrid.

4. Angulas: Baby eels! Actually to make this even weirder, I had imitation angulas….like the “krab” version of baby eels….I wish there was some way I could spell that with a ‘K.’ Maybe they could market it as baby EELZ?? Anyways,   real angulas are extremely expensive because they are hard to catch and equally difficult to cook correctly, hence the knock-off eels,  but I am keeping this on the list because they look like this, which is freaking weird. I mean, those are all WHOLE baby eels! Not spaghetti! But even the imitation ones were delicious! Like pasta! Made out of shrimp!!! My host family’s house, Madrid.

3. Pig’s ear: Cut into little pieces, served in a paella-ish rice dish. Some pieces still had pig hairs on them: Salamanca

2. Horse….specifically horse hamburger: Evidently they sell this at Carrefour in pre-made patties, it is called “Potro.” And evidently it’s not just horse, it’s baby horse. Lovely. I actually only at 1/4 of the burger before deciding I would let baby Black Beauty rest in peace as basura. My host family’s house, Madrid.

1. Sangre con tomate: Pig’s blood, mixed with tomato and congealed into cubes that you eat with a toothpick. As nasty as you would expect): La Puerta de Segura (obviously)

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